Thursday, November 27, 2014

He stood there silently 
I wanted to touch his soul 
But all I felt was his body
The skin full of pain 
That I could not heal 
That’s what we are 
Wounded humans 
And we cannot help 

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Hi Bye Hello Not

Here I am
After almost 3 years
Nothing has changed
And everything's different
But that's ok
It's just fine that things change
I made so many mistakes and it was all so natural
I guess I like doing that
You know, choosing wrong roads
This summer I decided to make it different
To stop doing stupid, careless things
I said 'no' a few times
And I regret it
Because if I said yes, I'd have fun
And now I don't have anything
He's a great guy...
but he wasn't worth saying no
He didn't fight for me
Well, actually he didn't have to fight
He hasn't done anything.

Tuesday, July 1, 2014

This is totally impossible

Oh my God.
When your dreams come true..
You start thinking if they weren't for sure nightmares.
My life gets crazy in the summer.
Impossible things happen.
As if I was leaving in a movie.
An extraordinary person, an ordinary actress.
If someone tells you that the world is bad and dangerous...
It is not.
It's just crazy and magical.

Tuesday, June 17, 2014

Well, at least I'm honest

People are so scared of this world but the only monsters here are us.
I must admit, it's not easy , you know, stop following the rules.
Because they're everywhere. Because others do. Because they will laugh.
But actually, who the hell cares?!
The people who laugh at you are going to forget you very soon.
And their opinion will remain with you forever.
Is that really what you want?
I always say something controversial.
Wow, so much tabu in my life. Sorry, i can't really relate which subject is appropriate and which is not.
I just don't care.
I am a girl and I:
- like sex (wow, wow 'like' is not the right word here) and nope, it's not pervert, it's normal... shock, hm?
- don't shave every day (even tough I like it),
- am not scared of talking about my period, wow guys, yes, there's actually a lot of blood but it's so natural that you shouldn't be scared of that... Are you gonna sleep in different beds with your future wife during her menstruation?
- love to eat, i'm not fat, nor a model, i'm just normal, imperfect and i'm trying to be okay with that.
And I'm doing everything to be happy.
I try to live in the present, eve though I love planning the future. We just need to get used to the fact that life changes our aims.
I always try too hard. Standing up for lost things, battles and people.
And I also make mistakes. Getting too close to the wrong people. And when I say 'close', I really mean it, nakedly (metaphorically and literally) and brutally. But that's okay. Because every mistake is a great experience. I like mistakes, making them is really fun. What about pain? Well, yeah, but still - you could feel worse if you didn't try.
Living safely is the worst thing you can ever do! You don't have to be boring! You don't have to always do the right things and follow the appropriate routes.
You also need to let people go. Not everyone's for you. But does it mean he doesn't deserve happiness? Well, usually not. So stop making curses and say to yourself: We were happy together, he's a great person, he's just not for me. He deserves to be happy, I want him to be happy. - That's the best thing you can do for yourself.

Monday, March 24, 2014


It's done.
We're done.
We're so fucking over. 

btw. when you mean 'trombamica', don't call it 'love'

Sunday, March 16, 2014

We'll never be more than this, will we?

I think God gives me men who fuck me up just to help me with creating my art.

Sunday, March 2, 2014

You're everywhere, yet I'm here alone

I can handle this pain when I'm awake.
I've got experience in letting go and moving on.
But when I fall asleep my dreams become nightmares. 
Because they give me what I want. 
And I want him so badly.